elfinblaze: (Arrow Laurel)
I'm currently on a rather rambling path through the animated DC universe. My newest purchase has been the Batman animated movie Under the Red Hood.

Click for my thoughts on the movie )

In summary: if you can stomach the agonising first scene, it's a VERY good movie. I have watched it twice already. It may even end up being my favourite Batman movie ever.


Nov. 1st, 2015 12:57 pm
elfinblaze: (me writing)
- Finally did my tax. JUST before the November deadline. This is the latest I've ever left it. But these past few months have been kind of crazy, so it's taken me a while to get on top of things.

- Some days I just want my Mami to come home and make dinner for the family. *sigh*

- On the up-side, my sister and I can finally run the house the way we want... and decorate it in all the tacky Halloween glory that we want.

- I would not wish caring for a cancer sufferer on anyone. Especially if the sufferer becomes a bully like my mother did at the end.

- On the other hand, yay, I can still make people laugh! I made a sales assistant laugh out loud today. I like when people get my jokes.
elfinblaze: (me writing)
A month ago I was looking forward to a family holiday, my sister only had her wedding on the brain, and my mother spent her days knitting and sleeping on the couch, or looking out the window, just people-watching.

It feels like a lifetime ago.

But now I'm feeling like I can face the world again.

In a way, my siblings and I had the best preparation it's possible to have. If it's in any way possible to be prepared for death. We knew our mother was sick for almost ten years. We always knew the risk she faced. But she got to watch us grow up. She got to meet her first grand-child. And now at least, we still have each other.

My sister is still getting married this month, and my aunt will still be in Australia for that. We're all still doing our chores and errands, like we always did. We still have our own lives to live. There's just an empty wheelchair and some unused canes in the background. We'll get used to that.

It'll just be a new normal.
elfinblaze: (me writing)
Tomorrow is the funeral.

We've requested people forgo flowers and instead donate to the Cancer Council, because my mother found a lot of information and support through them over the last ten years of her treatment.

My aunt has flown in from Germany, and it's wonderful having family around, and having her help around the house. She's been wonderful.

This morning, the local Catholic parish priest, Rev. Peter Lamont, held mass for my mother, even though we never even attended his church, which was so kind of him. What moved me further was that among the congregation, I recognised one of the local homeless men, and it really shows why kind of a priest Father Lamont is, when he's obviously been out in the community and invited and welcomed the local homeless people to come by. My brother calls him a "cool priest," but he's really just very experienced and friendly.

Even though my family isn't really religious, I'm glad he'll be overseeing my mother's funeral tomorrow. She would have liked him, I think.

I'm still struggling to think clearly and I have no idea what will happen with my family, my home, or anything else from now on, but I'm taking each day as it comes. One day at a time.

Thank you to everyone who has left messages. I won't reply individually, but it helps to know there is support out there. Thank you everyone for your kindness. It means a lot.
elfinblaze: (me writing)
My mother died at 5:30 this morning.

After I posted yesterday, we got a call from the hospital that she was deteriorating fast. Their estimation of weeks to live was revised down to days. We immediate went to see her.

She looked terrible, like she'd withered over night: gaunt, with her skin melting away from her face, eyes bulging, jaw sunken.

She mostly drifted out of consciousness/sleep/awareness, but she was responsive enough to recognise us (her family), and even smile when she saw her grand-daughter.

But she wasn't even aware of us leaving last night. Too out of it.

My sister stayed with her, until my brother went to relieve her at 3am.

He was with her when her rattling breathing eventually slowed and stopped. She had a "Do Not Resuscitate" order, so that was it.

We all flew back to hospital.

They let us stay as long as we needed.

I don't know what else to write. No other words are coming to me.


Busy Times

Aug. 19th, 2015 12:14 pm
elfinblaze: (me writing)
I feel like I should write something before life runs away with me.

Since I last blogged, I have been on holidays to the far north of Australia. Photos are up in my tumblr if anyone is interested in seeing what the most beautiful corner of the Earth looks like.

Three days after coming home, my mother forgot to take her medication and slept right through the day. She's been pretty bad about taking her medications recently anyway, getting me to double-check she was taking the right ones, taking an hour in between naps and drinking tea to actually take the whole lot of them, twice a day. But on that day she slept right through the morning.

When she finally got up at 4pm she was obviously in a lot of pain. Trying to get up and start her day, she ended up making a mess on the bathroom floor. When I helped her up, she was shaking, sweating, and panting loudly. Never a good sign, and the kind of thing that made me question how we were even going to make it through the day.

After an hour of struggling, I got her back into bed, and she asked me to call an ambulance.

Long story short: mother's back in hospital and not coming out any time soon.

Her sister (my aunt) is flying in from Germany this weekend. Don't know what will happen after that; I'm just taking each day at a time.

Busy times.
elfinblaze: (quiltbag)
- Salted pistachios for breakfast. I win at being an adult!

- Also, I'm one of those people who eats the garnishes on restaurant plates, because I love parsley. Today, Magpie and I were tasting the mini herb garden we set up last week. The Oregano was fine. Magpie loved the Chives. The Rosemary was amazing, and the Parsley was just divine! We had to drag ourselves away.

- Australian artists release an album for marriage equality in Australia.
Including Jimmy Barnes, Australian Idol Wes Carr, John Butler Trio, The Cat Empire, The Black Sorrows, and Katie Noonan, among others.

- Films That Will Haunt You. Forever.
My personal entry would be Ring 0: Birthday (リング0 バースデイ). That last shot of the movie still haunts me.

- Jut found this blog post about my old university. It even includes my most hated building: the biology building. Most hated, because in order to get to the classroms you have to circle three sides of the entire bloody building (the fourth side is labs that you can't just wander through)!


Jul. 10th, 2015 07:17 pm
elfinblaze: (me writing)
- I fell on our wood pile this morning. Achievement: dirty clothes and scraping skin off my arm. Well done, self.

- Two weeks ago all I could bring myself to do was to sit in bed, hiding from the world, hoping it would forget I existed, because it was all too much to face. Then I got an invite to [profile] viciousdisorder's house. It made me drag myself to the doctor and ask to go back on happy pills. Now, two weeks later I'm not yet ready to deal with Stuff, but I can see the light at the end of the tunnel already. Doctor said I look happier too.

- Just discovered http://www.sockdreams.com/ ... I am in heaven!

- New trailer for Supergirl. I cannot wait for this show to start!

- German songs from 2014: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AC_DCCHJs74
Includes some good ones.


Jun. 22nd, 2015 11:11 am
elfinblaze: (me writing)
- Mother is home from hospital. Not better, and she can't eat solid food anymore, but she reckons she'll hold on until September, when my sister gets married, cause she wants to be here for that. After that... we'll see.

- I just discovered the touch keyboard on my laptop. Ooooh. Now I can type with just my mouse.

- Open letter to the couple threatening to divorce if Australia passes marriage equality:
You are 'quitting' not because of anything having to do with your own marriage or family, but because another family might be given the opportunity for security, honor and growth. Your rationale is not sound, it is not compassionate, nor would anyone on any side of it grow better because of it. Your proposed actions are, in a word … childish.
I agree. Very much: "No, mine!" and "If we have to share our toys with the homos, we don't want them!!" With an added dash of: "ME! It's all about MEEE!!! Me! Me! Me! Your gay marriage is all about me! I'm the important one here! See what those nasty gay people are making me do?"

My suggestion still stands: Let's co-opt breathing so that the stupid people will stop doing it.

- Man, I'm in love with Matthew James Thomas' voice! He played Pippin in the 2013 Broadway revival of the musical.

- Ok, this Star Trek VS Star Wars video made me laugh. All so true. And I like them both.


Jun. 9th, 2015 09:35 am
elfinblaze: (me writing)
What a week the past one was:

- Mother went to hospital because she couldn't stop throwing up.

- Then our sewerage pipe broke in our backyard.

- Brother flew out to South America.

- Our house phone line still isn't working after construction workers dug up the street two weeks ago.

I'd like to know which primate decided we humans needed to forgo hibernation. They should be shot. I want a break.


Jun. 1st, 2015 12:22 pm
elfinblaze: (Arrow Laurel)
- This is so cool: Altas of the DC Comics Universe.

- Of all the comic book TV shows I do watch, I wasn't going to catch Lucifer because it sounded boring. Then I saw the trailer. It looks fun. And ridiculous. Thus fun. The fact that it's pissing off conservative Christians is an even better reason for me to check it out. Maybe at a fitting time like Christmas. [/bitter lapsed Catholic]

- I have not, however, seen Constantine, mainly because FUCKING GOYER!!

- From Bill Shorten's speech:
The Labor leader also argues that legalising same sex marriage sends a message of inclusion to younger Australians. “We are proud of you, for who you are. You belong.”
Everyone needs to hear that, not just young people. Thank you, Bill Shorten.
(The pictures I re-posted to my tumblr will tell you exactly what the government thinks of this bill.)

- But I completely agree with this too:
Parliament passed the Same‑Sex Relationships (Equal Treatment in Commonwealth Laws—General Law Reform) Act 2008... that gave same-sex couples the same legal status as straight de facto couples... It could just as easily have been 'An Act to get those rowdy gays off our backs without us actually having to legislate for marriage equality...'. Of course it was still a huge achievement, but as is typical for Australia on these matters it was the kind of victory that left a lot of people tapping their watches and going 'yeah, well, about time, isn't it' rather than leaping into the air in celebration.

That's the thing about all these announcements of support and progress from politicians. They never leave me wanting to shout for joy. I only ever want to roll my eyes and go, "yeah, I'll believe it when I see it", or "well, that was half a step forward." No jubilation. Just a vague sort of despair tinging everything.
elfinblaze: (quiltbag)

So let's get this straight (pun intended):

- For the past year Tanya Plibersek (Labour/opposition party) has been carrying her bill on marriage equality through the halls of parliament trying to get a co-sponsor from the ruling Liberal/National party coalition (to give it bi-partisan support).

- No one from the ruling Liberal/National coalition has been interested.

- Ireland passes marriage equality, and the leader of the Labour party (Bill Shorten) decides enough is enough, announcing his own bill with Tanya Plibersek's support.

- Liberal/National cries foul, saying (as near as I can tell) Shorten is only doing it for attention, or something.

- Best guesses say there's not enough supportive votes in parliament to pass the bill, but Shorten is pushing forward anyway.

- Prime Minister, Tony Abbott (Liberal Party), states Shorten is a meanie, and that he wants a bill with bi-partisan support. How dare the other side actually do something on their own, right?

- Warren Entch (Liberal Party) who has supported LGBT rights for a decade, decides not to support the Labour bill for unknown reasons, but instead set up his own bill, with Graham Perrett (Labour) and others from the Greens and Independant members of parliament, to give Tony Abbott exactly that scenario. "Oh yeah? You mean like this, Abbott?"

In conclusion: Australia has nothing but a bunch of little school boys in parliament. But hopefully they manage to get something decent done.

I would love it though if Australia was for once ahead of Germany. Please, please, please Australia? My other home country is being a doofus too.

Shorten's bill will be submitted to parliament on Monday (June 1st).


May. 28th, 2015 08:00 am
elfinblaze: (quiltbag)
What a fantastic week this is!

- The Lego I ordered on Friday afternoon arrived Monday before 8am (Shout out to Hobby Warehouse, because that was quick!)

- Ireland passes marriage equality!

- Bill Shorten actually did something hopeful for once by announcing his own bill for marriage equality. Source 1, Source 2, Source 3.

Thanks Bill Shorten for pushing the case. All the cynics criticising his timing can shut the hell up and stop making me wait. And Abbott, if you don't like Shorten owning something, own it yourself. Hypocrite.

Because even if this bill doesn't pass, the fallout from this failure will be bigger than the one from three years ago. Hopefully that fallout will push a few more yellow politicians to re-evaluate. And then Senators Hanson-Young and Leyonhjelm can introduce their respective bills to push again, and go a little further.

Stop waiting, start pushing for things to happen.
elfinblaze: (Arrow Laurel)
- I just spent three hours digging a wood splinter out of my thumb. Three hours! I kept sweating with anxiety and nausea, because I knew I'd have to take a small chunk of skin out with it because of how deep it went, so I had to pause and wipe my palms constantly. (The first sign I'm going to faint? Getting hot.)

But now that it's done I'm freezing again, and I can't hold anything in my left hand, so I'm eating a spring roll by holding it like a cigarette (and typing with my right hand).

I think I might need gardening gloves just to bring in the firewood from now on. I'm just a disaster.

- The Supergirl trailer looks fantastic! I'm not a Super-family fan, but this show looks like it will be a lot of fun.

- The Legends of Tomorrow trailer is equally exciting.

I know what shows I'm watching next year.

New Human!

May. 14th, 2015 07:58 am
elfinblaze: (me writing)
[livejournal.com profile] viciousdisorder had her second baby yesterday! After less than two hours in labour.

Although apparently I'm the last to know (just found out an hour ago), but this is to let anyone know in case they'e even more out of the loop than I am. Hee.

Both her and baby are well.

Anyone else want to go visit her?


Apr. 30th, 2015 01:43 pm
elfinblaze: (Arrow Laurel)
- My unpopular opinion of the week: I kinda like the new Jared Leto Joker look. It's different. Different interests me. Plus, grinning man with surgical glove = nightmare fuel. So it's working for me.

Of course, I am also one of those crazy people who likes Arrow better than The Flash, so what do I know?

- Quick dose of faith in humanity: Men around the world are painting their nails in support of Bruce Jenner

- Former homophobes reveal what changed their minds
Yes, reddit, I know, but I promise this thread is worth reading.


Apr. 23rd, 2015 04:50 pm
elfinblaze: (me writing)
- Six months and I haven't managed to kill my cactus yet! I haven't been trying, but normally I kill everything I put in the ground. Or it never comes up in the first place.

- Pictures I took of the Parramatta River today. Banks? What banks? If you walk past, you can still see that the water was much higher yesterday; the nearby roads are all dusted with sand and soil, in ripples like water currents, where the high water washed it on shore. It's a mess.

- I am caught up on Arrow and The Flash! Finally. Such fun shows.

- The only internet comment section worth reading is at Slacktivist, and especially this post, where people discuss whether a human/kryptonian hybrid is possible.
I'm not saying that interbreeding is tremendously likely, but anyone who says "Oh, I can accept that an alien would look and act recognizably human, but interbreeding is beyond the pale because of the astronomical odds involved" isn't on solid scientific ground. The odds of two species that are so similar not being able to interbreed might be high, but the odds of two species being so similar is many many times higher.
Ahh, nerds.

- No, that's not true. The comment section of Badass Digest is also a good place.

Star Wars!

Apr. 17th, 2015 12:23 pm
elfinblaze: (Torchwood)
The new Star Wars trailer is making me all excited:
That theme music!
(If the embed doesn't work The Guardian also has a copy of the trailer.)

That might not be Tatooine but those dunes look familiar enough to tap into the nostalgia all the same. Besides, I'm sure lots of planets have a desert. :D

And I now have a new desktop picture:

If I were still a student I would do another Star Wars marathon, like my school friends and I did after seeing Episode 1. Day at the cinema, followed by staying up all night to watch the original trilogy all in one go.

For the record, I haven't got round to watching Mark Hamill's episode of The Flash yet. I am so far behind in everything...


Apr. 1st, 2015 05:10 pm
elfinblaze: (Torchwood)
- Down For Everyone Or Just Me? is the most helpful website ever. Yes, Ticketmaster's website is broken for everyone and not just me.

- Tunnel to the other side of the Earth.
So, if I were to start digging in my back garden, I would end up in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean. However, if I were to try to run as far away from Sydney as possible without drowning, I'd be living in the Azores. Cool.

(Did you know that a lot of people from the Azores emigrated to Brazil? They still maintain their own small cultural groups there. /Random fact I remember from Anthropology.)

- I hate April 1st, but these made me smile.
The Australian Sex Party issued a press release this morning announcing they had merged with the Shooters & Fishers [Party]. The name of this new alliance? The Sex Pistols, of course.

- I have a bone to pick with TOR's Best Shakespeare Adaptations For Teenagers. How can this be a complete list without the inclusion of Were The World Mine? It is the best take on A Midsummer Night's Dream that I've seen, because it gets to the heart of the original play but explores those ideas in a modern environment. At least someone mentioned it in the comments. *harrumph*

I do agree that Romeo Must Die is an excellent spin on Shakespeare's play though, and it's my favourite one on the TOR list.


Mar. 31st, 2015 06:29 pm
elfinblaze: (Harry Potter Hermione)
- If you'd like a dent in your forehead, try going through the "homosexual agenda" tag on tumblr. Guaranteed headdesking.
It's all: "Don't you see that intolerance of intolerance is intolerant? You should let me 'live and let live', the way I don't let you. So stop being such a hypocrite."
No, I'm not a train wreck enthusiast, really. :)

- I am so unfit. I started a simple daily 5-10 minute exercise routine last week and now I ache all over. Owwwww...

- On the other hand, books I have read so far this week:
Hero, by Perry Moore
Princesses #2: The Mermaid's Madness, by Jim C. Hines
Princesses #3: Red Hood's Revenge, by Jim C. Hines
And it's only Tuesday. What am I doing with my life?

- Where have all the lesbians gone in TV and film?
I was just thinking about this last week. Plenty of shows currently featuring queer men, but not so much women. It sucks that I don't like prison shows, so Orange is the New Black is right out for me. Glee is over, Lost Girl is ending this year, what does that leave? Maybe Orphan Black, but the lesbian on that show is dying, and clones don't really interest me (I'm making myself trudge through my sister's DVDs, hoping the show will hook me, but no luck so far). There's not a lot of options out there right now.

- I'm still trying to untangle all the historical threads of Christianity, so I love this quote:
"One of my Calvinist friends... describes the branches of the Reformation this way: If you picture the Church as a chest of drawers, the Lutherans went drawer by drawer and discarded items they felt were wrong. The Calvinists dumped out all the drawers, then methodically sorted through the stuff and returned only that which they thought was essential. The Anabaptists took an axe to the whole thing and resolved to start over with a new chest of drawers."


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